Self Belief

Self Belief

Self Belief

What is it and why do we need it?

We demonstrate the confidence and belief we have in ourselves in a number of ways; our behaviour, our mood and even how we carry ourselves. It’s common for individuals who lack self-belief and self-confidence to find certain areas of their life affected.

Self-confidence is extremely important in almost every aspect of our lives, yet so many people struggle to find it. Sadly, this can be a vicious circle: people who lack self-confidence can find it difficult to become successful.

Examine your strengths, limitations and the reality of your situation honestly every day. Some days you won’t believe in yourself, and that’s OK. But if you can unpack and see where that temporary disbelief is rooted, you’ll identify what’s needed to move forward.

Moving forward ultimately leads to success, nothing more

That’s right, believing in yourself is a choice. It is an attitude you develop over time. Think positively about yourself. Remind yourself that, despite any problems, you are a unique, special, and valuable person, and that you deserve to feel good about yourself.

The thing about confidence is that you get it by doing things over and over again. And while I’m not going to pretend everyone you come into contact with will be lovely and supportive if you ask for help, most people love helping others because it makes them feel good.

Always celebrate your successes and encourage yourself when you face setbacks. Building confidence does not happen overnight; it takes time for your brain to be convinced of the compliments you give yourself. Speaking comments out loud while you look back at your image in the mirror can help as it is you actually talking to yourself helps build self confidence.

You have to learn to be aware of your self-talk, the thoughts you have about yourself and what you’re doing. I learned to recognize negative self-talk, and soon I learned a trick that changed everything in my life: I would imagine that a negative thought was a bug, and I would be on the lookout for these. When I caught one, I would stop it and squash it, question it then replace it with a positive one.

Regards

Adam

024 77676915 Office

www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk


“Coventry Psychotherapy & Hypnotherapy Conference 2019”

I thought I’d let you know my experience of speaking at this conference and the other speakers at the event set up by Nick Davies of The Warwickshire School of Hypnotherapy.

So the first speaker of the day was who I will describe as a real gentleman with a wealth of knowledge. Steven Blake who talked about his methods of dealing with pain and his system called “Oldpain2go”.

I’d heard really good things and was certainly intrigued by the method and thoughts behind it, I wasn’t disappointed. I loved the approach and application of the techniques which was demonstrated by Steven in a master class of elegance and skill. Steven has a real passion for helping people and that shone through in his presentation.  I will certainly be training in this, I was up next and what a tough act to follow!

I spoke about my approach and thoughts on “Weight Management” using my unique approach which is a little different from tradition.  I shared my finding on “What, How and Why” people eat and also the relation to digesting information going into Transactional Analysis, Metaphor work and the provocative style I use with some more challenging clients.

I really enjoyed the experience and hope the other delegates and speakers enjoyed my contribution and challenging methods.

The next speaker was someone I know, my friend, mentor, supervisor and organiser of the conference, Nick Davies.

Nick presentation was on PTSD and Trauma which he has featured in many media publications and radio. He is known as “The PTSD Whisper” and is in my opinion the go to guy on this subject.

Nick has all the neurology to back up his BLAST® Technique and his presenting style is very polished he is very easy to listen to also eager to answer any questions on the subject. His passion is clear and knowledge is outstanding. Nick is world class and once again proved it with a demonstration of his skill with people. I never fail to learn when around Nick.

Next up was Christopher Paul Jones also known as “The Breakthrough Expert” and also has been featured on TV and media and is very charismatic.

Christopher spoke on fears and phobia’s and has a deep knowledge on the subject interacting with the audience and sharing some great tips and tricks to deal with any issues client have. The presentation was slick and professional incorporating a real personal story of his fear of flying and how he overcame this. Chris also did a live demo which was very good helping someone with a fear of dogs.

Big Darren Housley was next talking on more of the business side of therapy, Practice Building. Darren is probably the busiest therapist I know seeing up to 30 clients a week in Yorkshire. Darren’s presentation was delivered with humour and knowledge. This is an area which is neglected by some therapist so the information was of great value and I think we all learned a great deal from it. It’s great to see a person with a passion for helping as many people as he can succeed and also so free with his inside knowledge so other can gain from that. He held nothing back and was very open and honest with any questions from the delegates and another true gent of this profession.

Last but not least was Colin T Fisher someone new to me and talking on the subject “Law of Attraction”.  I must admit I used to be a little sceptical on this subject however I always approach anything with an open mind.  Colin certain has a lot of energy when presenting and had us all in the right vibe. He presentation talked a lot about what he thought was missing from a lot of LOA stuff and I must admit I liked him from the off. I’m certainly going to put into practice what he taught as a lot of it was good advice that made sense, none of the fluffy nonsense, it also helped he is a very good business man so lives in the real world and shared his successes and failures with us. He is also was a bloody nice bloke.

All in all the day was a great success. I look forward to next year’s conference which I’m sure will be bigger, better (If that’s possible!) and with more speakers.

Adam Cowming

Beautiful Life Hypnotherapy

www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk 024 77676915


Why come to see a therapist?

Taking care of your mental health is an important step in caring for yourself as a whole. Stress, anxiety, depression, addictions, and more can all affect your day-to-day life; seeing a therapist can help you form healthy coping tactics that can improve your quality of life. In some cases, symptoms can be indicators of larger problems, and a therapist can offer insight into what may be causing them.

Therapy used to have the stigma that it was only for seriously “messed up” people. And though some of those feelings still exist, the stereotype is slowly being left behind.

Many people find that therapy also provides some unexpected benefits. When they leave, they realize they’ve gotten more than they bargained for—sort of a bonus for engaging in the experience.

The main objective is helping people relieve their symptoms and underlying issues. But if they can resolve their problem while becoming better listeners and empathizers with an ability to discuss deep issues in a way that positively impacts their inner circle, what’s the problem?

Therapy isn’t just for moments of earth-shattering personal tragedies. It can also be useful in reorienting yourself toward your true wants and needs, training yourself in the art of self-compassion, and better understanding, respecting, and communicating your feelings. And—surprise—it’s often easier to pursue these goals when you’re not wrestling bigger, darker obstacles. So consider this your permission to give therapy a try, even if your life is going hunky-dory. Your future self may just look back and say, “Thanks!”

Rather than seeking out therapy (men?), people will convince themselves that everything is fine. They tell themselves their sadness, worry, irritability, sleeping problems, high stress, and physical tension will dissipate independently.

The real courage comes from identifying the need for treatment and sharing this need with trusted people in your life. Shouting your symptoms across every social media platform isn’t necessary or helpful — you only have to admit the truth to yourself.

Regards

Adam

Beautiful Life Hypnotherapy

024 77676915

www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk


Hypnotherapy for IBS

Hypnotherapy for IBS

 

Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is a common condition of the digestive system. IBS affects up to 22% of people in the UK and is the most common functional digestive disorder

So what causes IBS?

Well psychological factors such as stress may play a part in IBS and I’ve seen people recover quickly form IBS with the help of hypnotherapy. When the body is under stress it can come out in all sorts of symptoms from mental health issues to physical symptoms.

Hypnotherapy for IBS can help you break the cycle of pain and anxiety related to IBS, and has done so for thousands of people. Hypnotherapy is now acknowledged within the wider medical profession as an evidenced-based therapy that can help reduce the symptoms of IBS, and sometimes alleviate those symptoms entirely.

Dr Valori, of Gloucestershire Royal Hospital, said the research evidence which shows that hypnotherapy could help sufferers of IBS was first published in the 1980s. Dr Roland Valori, editor of Frontline Gastroenterology, said of the first 100 of his patients treated, symptoms improved significantly for nine in 10. He audited the first 100 cases he referred for hypnotherapy and found that the symptoms stopped completely in four in ten cases with typical IBS. He says in a further five in 10 cases patients reported feeling more in control of their symptoms and were therefore much less troubled by them.

University of Manchester, Manchester, United Kingdom.

“There is now good evidence that hypnotherapy benefits a substantial proportion of patients with irritable bowel syndrome and that improvement is maintained for many years. Most patients seen in secondary care with this condition also suffer from a wide range of noncolonic symptoms such as backache and lethargy, as well as a number of musculoskeletal, urological, and gynaecological problems. These features do not typically respond well to conventional medical treatment approaches, but fortunately, their intensity is often reduced by hypnosis.

The mechanisms by which hypnosis mediates its benefit are not entirely clear, but there is evidence that, in addition to its psychological effects, it can modulate gastrointestinal physiology, alter the central processing of noxious stimuli, and even influence immune function.”

Link to Study
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18501263?ordinalpos=2&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum

For more inforation on how I can help you with Hypnotherapy for IBS contact me HERE.

Hypnotherapy For IBS


Rest and Recuperation

Rest and Recuperation

June 17, 2014

 

 

Rest is a very important part of recovery for the body and mind. Too many people over look or deny themselves this, we all need it and it is important.

I’ve just got back from 9 days in Egypt, I needed the holiday as I been working hard on my business and haven’t taken a real break for a couple of years. I’ve had the odd long weekend away but not a solid block of time relax and switch off. I didn’t check my phone or emails or did I want to, I wanted a complete break. Apart from some scuba diving which I find very relaxing I just chilled out in the sun being very lazy indeed. I am very careful and do take days off in the week and regularly do self-hypnosis.

People live very busy life’s week in week out and don’t release the toll it can take to often it’s too late and they start to become ill. People can get flu-like symptoms and just think it a cold but it’s the bodies way of try to slow you down almost a little warning sign to say you need to get some rest.

I have 2 friends whom I know have suffered as a results of living too much of a stressful life, one collapsed with stress which was caused by trying to do too much and not taking a break. My other friend is now suffering and this was caused by stress of work and personal issues. Both of these friends developed ME or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Chronic fatigue syndrome causes persistent fatigue (exhaustion) that affects everyday life and doesn’t go away with sleep or rest.  It is estimated that around 250,000 people in the UK have CFS

Having talked about this with them one of my friends said he believes the body has a set point of energy which we can dip in and out of every day but if we keep going into the reserves without giving it back then the body and mind will only allow this to happen before it starts the warning signs and then as a last resort it can shut us down by in some cases developing ME to not allow us to ever take too much again.  If we use 85% of energy and that safe to do every day then when we start using that extra 15% without giving back or in other words resting and having a break then it becomes a problem. My friends set point are now at a guess 50% of what they used to be getting tired very fast often feeling completely exhausted after a normal day. Please note: These cases are from what my friends have told me, and NOT me giving medical diagnosis.

We don’t fully understand what causes the illness. There are likely to be a number of factors involved. It sometimes affects more than one family member. The reasons are being studied but it seems your genes can play a part, as can the influence of your environment.

My advice would be to listen to what your body is telling you. If you know you need a break book a couple of days off and rest and give back what energy you may have taken and try not to go over that 85% if you do give it back as soon as possible. Try not to put yourself under long-term stress and strains in work or personal life. Look at learning some progressive relaxation techniques and do 10 minutes every day or even better learn self-hypnosis.

If you find yourself really struggling to de-stress then why not consider a stress buster session either with myself or someone local to you.

See you soon

Adam

https://www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk


Parts Therapy

Parts Therapy

April 9, 2014

 

This is one of the tools as a hypnotherapist I use a lot because it gets good results across the board for a range of problems and issues. So what is parts therapy?

Parts therapy is a tool in which the therapist can gain access to the unconscious parts of the mind by way of relaxing the client and taking them into hypnosis. As the client goes into hypnosis the unconscious mind sometimes wants to communicate to the therapists or will allow the therapist to negotiate a better outcome for the client. We can gain communication with the part by either asking it to signal yes or no using a finger on either hand; this is called ideo motor movements. In some cases I can get vocal agreement as well but this is not as common as getting some form of movement.

Our unconscious is there to help and protect us, and through this mechanism the unconscious sets up specific ‘parts’ to deal with trauma or special needs the individual may require. It is the nature of the mind to be subdivided into a number of ‘parts’. The intention of each ‘part’. There are no ‘bad’ parts and the goal of Parts Therapy is not to eliminate ‘parts,’ but instead to help find positive roles or behaviours also called jobs.

This will not be a conscious movement by the client in fact most of the time they will not be aware of their finger moving during the session. We can ask the part if it would be prepared to take on a better behaviour or if it would like to help the client by changing an outdated program. Sometimes this is straight forward but other times it can take a while to get the part to agree to a different outcome that it is happy about. There are other occasions that the part doesn’t know it is running an out dated program because it has worked for the client so far, but as we change from children to adults we often can take outdated behaviours with us and this is because they may have been protecting the client it someway. Our unconscious mind is there to protect us.

We can also get a part to talk to us via the client’s voice box or move a body part, for example the shoulders instead of the fingers, even open the client’s eyes. This is a very powerful tool that can help clients though all sorts of problems in life and one which I have had some amazing results helping clients make life changing progress even after just one session.

The part sometimes doesn’t want to talk or communicate at all and I’ve sometime got no response at all so I simply ask the part to let the client know somehow that it is present.

I’ve seen one client move violently and almost thrown from the chair, the client didn’t even know it had happened during the session. It can be quite upsetting if a client brings a partner into the therapy room during a session and I’ve had to ask them to sit down and let the session continue or leave the room on more than one occasion as they didn’t understand what was going on. I know it was them wanting to stop or protect their partners. In fact this was only the mind processing trauma, but they wouldn’t have known that. I now explain this away from the client before I allow partners in my therapy room if I suspect this may happen, it easier for them and me!

Regards

Adam

Beautiful Life Hypnotherapy

www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk


Pain

Pain

October 30, 2013

Pain is a very interesting area to work with and one that I’ve helped clients to gain control of.

So what is pain?

Pain is essentially an electrical signal sent via nerve pathways to your brain. Pain is the way your brain interprets information about a particular sensation that your body is experiencing. Interestingly there is no such thing as a pain center in your brain, the area’s that are activated when we feel pain are the same area’s that are activated with emotions and attention. The area of the brain is called the anterior cingulate cortex which resembles a “collar” surrounding the frontal part of the corpus callosum in the limbic system of the brain.  A lot of people therefor say pain is a perception. I know when I’ve hit my thumb with a hammer it bloody hurt!

Doctors can prescribe some powerful pain killers to help managed the discomfort it can cause. There are other things pain can cause too like depression due to being in constant pain, irritability and sleeplessness but to name a few. Painkillers interfere with the pain messages sent to your brain so dull the signal from the nerves to the brain, they don’t cure it but mask it. Pain is there for a good reason it’s our bodies way of saying something isn’t right or needs out attention, like my thumb!

So how can I help, well studies like the ones below point to good results using hypnosis.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2752362/

“The findings indicate that hypnosis interventions consistently produce significant decreases in pain associated with a variety of chronic-pain problems”

Also

“In 2004, researchers at the University of Iowa Roy J. and Lucille A. Carver College of Medicine and the Technical University of Aachen, Germany, tried to identify the exact effect of hypnosis on the brain using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI). fMRI measures blood flow in the brain and can be used to view activity in different regions of the brain in real time. More blood flow indicates more activity. To conduct the experiment, the researchers asked participants to first identify when a hot surface became painful to the touch (an eight on a scale from zero to ten) and used fMRI to determine where the brian sent the pain signal. They then hypnotized the subjects and gave them suggestions aimed at reducing pain while increasing the temperature on the surface to the level previously reported as painful. All subjects reported reduced pain (less than a three on the pain scale) if they reported any pain at all. Additionally, the fMRI scan revealed a highly reduced amount of activity in the primary sensory cortex as well as the other high-level pain areas of the brain. Activity in the lower levels of the brain were unaffected by hypnosis, implying that the only changes hypnosis produced were in the conscious levels of the brain.”

http://www.science20.com/welcome_my_moon_base/does_hypnosis_work_relieve_pain

Hypnosis helps the client to go into another state of mind in which they can help to control the emotions linked to the pain and attention to that pain. I think this is one but not the only reasons why it works and this is just my opinion.

Regards

Adam

www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk


Who Are You Calling Fat?

Who Are You Calling Fat?

 

FAT a word people avoid using because they think it will upset to many clients.

I USE IT with all my weight management clients. Why?

First of all it’s a medical term for what it is and second it about being honest with yourself and myself being honest with you.

I know some fat people who hate the word and refuse to use it or admit they are fat and overweight, those people will not seek help and unluckily for them will probably remain fat and unhealthy risk all sort of weight related issues when they are older.   I leave them to make that choice.

I have tried many ways and methods to treat my clients and always respect my clients. I explain in the complimentary consultation that I do and will use the word fat.

I think being straight talking and honest is the best way to help clients in this area of weight management. I have a couple of rules but the main one is to leave the excuses at the door so we can work on the real reasons. The more you make excuses the more it validates your behaviour or bad habits.

Once we get to the core issues and help to resolve them I then work on the education of the client helping them with diet and general advice mixing it in with some confidence, self-esteem and determination. I want them to feel good about a change in their lifestyle, their mind set and themselves.

So using the word FAT is a tool I use in a very straight talking but understanding and respectful way.

Contact me today for a consultation.

Regards

Adam


Anxiety and Panic Attacks

Anxiety and Panic Attacks

First published May 22, 2013

Over the last few weeks and months I’ve seen a big increase though my therapy practise of people suffering anxiety or panic attacks.

A lot of people complain of very similar symptoms such as racing heart beat and a feeling on being on edge all of the time among other things.

So what happening to cause people to feel like this?

First of all it will be more than likely start with something internally like negative dialog, which will create a picture in the mind. These two things together then create or start the process of creating a negative and most unwelcome feeling.

So the process starts at a neurological level in the brain.  It could be argued that anxiety itself is its own neurological symptom. After all, anxiety can change neurotransmitter levels in your brain causing them to send unusual signals to the rest of your body that  actually effect all your nervous systems and causes real sensations/symptoms.

The forebrain is the area most affected in people with anxiety and panic attacks disorders. The limbic system, which is involved in storing memories and creating emotions, is also thought to play a central role in processing all anxiety-related information. Both the locus coeruleus and the dorsal raphe project to the septohippocampal circuit, which in turn projects to other areas of the limbic system that mediate anxiety. The hippocampus and amygdala are of particular importance, as they are interconnected and also project to both subcortical and cortical nuclei. The amygdala fires off the fight, flight or freeze reaction in the brain then floods the body with adenine. It is the increased activity of the amygdala that causes the symptoms of anxiety and panic. It acually happens like this freeze, fight or flight.

Normally after each anxiety event, the amygdala resets itself to a normal level. But if we continue to experience anxiety or stress over a long period of time, our amygdala is modified and becomes fixed at a high anxiety level. In other words it is in the on position and needs to be switched off.

So it is a very real problem for some people. I think that a panic attack is anxiety but a much stronger reaction, anxiety that has been allowed to grow and become somewhat out of control. A friend who was a nurse in A&E in a local hospital said that 99% of people admitted to hospital who think they are having a heart attack are actually experiencing a panic attack

Anxiety and panic attacks can be cause by increased stress and inadequate coping mechanisms may contribute to anxiety.

One of the best ways to help yourself is to try deep breathing exercise every day for around 10 – 15 minutes at time.

How to do Deep Breathing Exercises:

  1. Find somewhere comfortable where you will not be disturbed during the exercise, if necessary tell who you live with family etc than you don’t want to be disturbed and to be considerate to your needs.
  2. Lie down or sit in a comfy chair, place your hands on your lower stomach. Breathe in through your nose so that your stomach rises, this mean than you will be breathing from the bottom of the lungs not the top. Hold the breath for a couple of seconds then slowly breathe out.
  3. Repeat these 3 or 4 times then allow your breathing to go back to normal.
  4. Concentrate on different parts of the body allowing these to relax one by one starting with the top of your head and working all the way down to the tips of your toes. Image you are in a wonderfully relaxing a safe place, I like to think of myself lying on a beach sunbathing.
  5. Just allow yourself 10 to 15 minutes of relaxing this way every day making part of your lifestyle. Try not to fall asleep as relaxation is different to sleep so you don’t want to associate relaxing with going to sleep although you may find it hard not too drop off at first.

If you feel you need a little more help then please contact me via the website or the office telephone number. www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk or contact me HERE

I am available for one to one or Skype (adam.cowming) therapy sessions if you can’t get to my office in person.

Regards

Adam


Provocative Change Works

 

Provocative Change Works

First published on April 15, 2013

I’ve just attended a Nick Kemp workshop called “Provocative Change Works” or PCW

I wasn’t really sure about the approach to this kind of therapy as it is something I’ve never done before. I’d seen Nick working using this method online and I just didn’t get what was going on. I knew Nick was a world-class therapist so something was going on but what?

Having found the venue in Swindon I found out that most of the attendees were doing the PCW workshop as part of their ongoing  NLP Master Practitioner course and a few like me were there to just learn about PCW. I was made to feel very much welcome by the host of the training Tony Nutley from UK College of Personal Development.

While sat listening to Nick he started the learning process in a very humoured manner explaining everything in an easy to understand way, no big unnecessary words (phew). I instantly liked the PCW approach and Nick’s relaxed yet informative manner. It was a lot of fun right from the off. Nick did the first live one to one demo session of around 25 minutes. The demo was with a real issue that Nick knew nothing about beforehand. I sat, watched and listened.

Nick then started to breakdown the session using the 27 PCW stances and explaining what and why he used one or another. I was surprised just how many times he changed stances with ease and no effort, it just seem to flow in a very natural and easy way. It was more like a chat with a mate than therapy, or that is the perception. Once the subtleties are exposed I began to see what a very simple but fantastic way of working this is.  I thought “Now this is something I can use”.

What I also found interesting is that it was put into the NLP training as it really does grind some NLPers up the wrong way. It doesn’t fit into their way of working at first.  I decided before hand to go in and learn with an open mind, I wasn’t even thinking about NLP.  The demo subjects struggled against the approach a bit, and some even said it made them feel a little angry. It wasn’t the therapy making them angry but their own fame of working and being totally taken out of it to the point of confusion. This was just simply brilliant work by Nick. He knew exactly what and why he was doing it even if the demo subjects didn’t. I love the fact the host asked Nick to come and do the PCW training on a NLP course, talk about throwing in a proverbial spanner in the works. Great move Tony!

I am pleased to report the demos were explained and people started, like me, to really understand to inner working to the PCW approach. Nick did four live demo’s throughout the day and each one I was captivated by Nicks work and the subject reactions and feedback. At times it was tear rolling funny, even more if the subject was trying to worm out of things a bit, Nick wanted to elicit more information and was also testing for hesitation from the client. Nick also used Ericksonian language to great effect.

When Nick adopts a different stance in the sessions it moves the client’s “Perceptual Position” which then caused the subject to react in a different way with every change in stance. Nick also used a lot of “Time Framing” work to great effect, and confusing the subject. This takes them out their frame of thought. All of these things were going on; their heads were spinning at the end of the 25 minutes. They look confused, unsure, tired and it was left like that. It was funny to watch and humour was used to great effect.

People think because it is “Provocative” then it must aggressive but this far from the truth, it is all done in friendly banter and with a twinkle in the eye. It does provoke change but in a very nice if what confusing (for the subject) way. All 4 subjects reported a change in the way the problem or ex problem was now perceived the next day in the follow-up sessions. It got the desired result for the subject. I think that is the important bit; it doesn’t really matter to subject how it happened. That is what client comes for in therapy, a good result.

This is the start of an excited journey using and exploring this PCW work with my clients to help them even more. I’m still unpacked the information from the weekend and will let you know how I’m getting on with it. I still have 2 DVD’s to study yet, so more work is going to begin. I know that my learning is just starting with this way of working but i’ve got a good feeling that this really will be a big part of any therapy I do from now on.

I know that this training will make me a better therapist, and the fact that I had solid foundation with all of my training from the beginning has also without doubt helped me get where I am today.

A big thank you to Nick Kemp for a truly wonderful weekend of learning and Tony Nutly for being a great host and all round nice guy.

Nick’s PCW Link

http://www.provocativechangeworks.com/

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog

Adam

https://www.blhypnotherapy.co.uk